Unity in Peace prayers for we the people of all tribes  
this is a photo from the archived Liberty file long time ago!

Ok Inner self – time to talk of What ‘Is’ in this moment – to listen to the feelings and thoughts which feel Bad, those that feel Good, and also any Wise thoughts and give them a voice and of course, tell the truth what is going on inside – don’t sugar coat it for me


What is bogging you down? Why don’t you write anymore?

Because I am over trying to explain to the outer world posts and art

which make perfect sense to me but I have this feeling of like

I can’t get it quite right other wise it would resonate with others

so I am feeling a writers block. ok, now to dig for the root.

a feeling of failure.

talk to it.

get to know how it thinks

ok. failure feeling what are you thinking and feeling?  well, I guess taking on War and the Law was a big task emotionally and I am feeling it today

I also feel insufficient in what little I have done to try to help and how selfish of me to get discouraged – this awareness actually makes me feel worse but’s it’s ok b/c I know how to get out of the feeling – but I must give it voice .  I feel like I am not doing enough b/c what I am doing is drop in the bucket what others are enduring and doing and have done. 

How to transform this feeling of failure to help Tibet thru Amercan Law

thinking I am not doing enough adds another layer I also feel mentally  tired when it comes to mustering passion to write something that could help, with fun and love. 

To many pots on the fire and I don’t know which story base to begin and flow  with …like do I write tantra fiction stories (like for troops) so they get taste of what could be

or do I write letters to political minds to help us come out of dark ages of repeating deadly patterns and break us out of denial? It feels like too many words and not enough center. 

Do I write about Tibet in a fairy tale story? 

Do I not write at all and make a video or art instead?

or meditate?

 Dear God help me know what to do. (p.s. I have been writing Dear God letters to myself since a little girl and sometimes still do) 

I am so tired emotionally – I just want to sleep and I know that is not the answer and will help no one but me.  But maybe a happier rested filled with yoga me will then have her passion reawakened.  Maybe to focus on me is what I need right now?  rather than all this union and merger of outer world situations into some happy ever after scenario you sing and speak about every day.  it is a use of emotion and there is a reason you feel emotionally drained and the energy of frustration sometimes.  it is normal and ok. 

in my brain, I am Trying to use symbolism to unite – wake us up – singing songs with all my heart energy in the spontaneous moment – writing my feelings through the years has brought me to this point of yet again – facing failure and looking directly in the mirror and feeling Tibet calling out for help.  Awaken the dream they say on Oprah and in New Age books and I think Life Coaches encourage the Dream to awaken to – yes, awaken the dream, but then prepare for the aftershock to your heart after it awakens and then has to deal with reality of others not wanting to awaken from the nightmare.

This is not helping – I feel like I am yet again wasting valuable time.  Forget this. 

June 8, 2013  Good thoughts

Please forgive me allowing these failure thoughts a voice, but I am also aware of the victory voice – I just have to truthful what is here now as I grow.  Please forgive me, Kalu Rinpoche, for getting discouraged sometimes with my self talk.  I think there is long lineage inside me of woman feeling body who has felt ultimate betrayal and ultimate truth body Guru Love in her tantric relationship with men throughout time.   I used to write about it, but then I realized in hearing the teachings that it is not all about ‘me’ so I stopped writing what was going on with ‘me’ to me.  Now I sit and am writing again but computer making heating fan noises and very hot – something wrong maybe so I stop writing and back to inner out quiet dialogue with the 35 Buddhas and the world of ‘we the people’ – I speak to both and no one 24/7.  Free speech.

Tibet. You are free.  My wish to Marry Your Country to My Country has come true.  Love wins and all nations rejoice!  A love story can awaken the world of Love….which is this world.  Welcome now

To our new world order on OWN

Declaration of Interdependence

I declare I am interconnected to every other sentient being

I declare to serve compassionate intentions

I declare I have a right to serve Love and and be served love in return

When tyranny strikes it is up to the people to recognize it and with recognition they can use the law to uphold spiritual law

The American Dream is to merge spiritual law with the material world – church and state united under the Higher laws of the Universe

If agree for $1 Bill of Human rights Tree and would sign the declaration of Interdepences as a citizen of the New World Order (i.e. code for OWN & Co. )  we plant the international voice for peace and human rights tree at White House.  The Thomas Paine quote comes to mind of the Liberty tree a quote used on an alchemy love experiment I did with 33 men 10 year ago life review
‘In her hand (Oprah’s)she carries a tree she plants the tree…..

2012 Camara 195

June 4, 2013

note to self: Remind self write 10 year review

b/c/Good to see patterns and sometimes it’s interesting for me to look back and read.

and learn from